Archive for June, 2009

Incompetent, I am

IncompetenceThere are not that many things which are truly freeing in life.  I have run into quite a number of things which have the impression of being freeing, however, they end up dealing more bondage (or I end up making it more bondage than it should be).  For me, one such thing is coffee.  I love me some!  Especially when I have had a rough morning.  The caffeine gives me energy, it gives me freedom, it gives me open eyes!  However, with all the things it gives, I have become somewhat a slave to it (If you are wondering, the reason I have put “somewhat” is because I am in denial).  If I do not have it then I am miserable with a headache, moody with shortness – both in stature and temprament. 

So this past week I have learned something which gives freedom.  This is the idea of starting my day with the understanding that I will be incompetent today.  Randy shared a bit about his mantra and this was the first part.  I have been chewing on this idea and the more I do the more I recieve from it. 

I am a fallen, I am not perfect, I am in need of grace.  You see, I am one of those people whose toughest critics are themselves.  But when I think about this, I end up practicing grace on myself.  Let me just say, there is Freedom in this action!  The interesting thing about this is that when I have intentionally done this, I end up doing the same with those around me.  Funny how that is…. 

Not sure how, but I want to incorporate this somewhere in my montra!

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Training VS Trying

Me RunningAre we able to differentiate between what it looks like to try and train?  This is one of the concepts Randy Harris left me to ponder in one of the discussions we had.  I am still unpacking this in life, (and will always be unpacking it) but I think what hit me is actually freedom for something in the future.  Allow me to explain.

Firstly, I am in the midst of training for a marathon.  The more I train the easier certain distances get, and even the distances which I first thought were hard have become easier.  Even my perspective of them has lessened.  That last point is an interesting point in and of itself.  I think it is a bit deeper than what I think, but then again I could just be thinking about that all wrongly.  The goal in this is to be ready to run on the 30th of August the entire marathon.  Or at least semi – job the entire thing.

In the realm of spirituality, the training looks a great deal like the spiritual disciplines.  Whether this be practicing silence, meditation, and so forth.  The goal is to be shaped into the image of God.  You don’t just try to act like the image of God, rather you train to look like this.  You end up acting in the ways of Jesus, without even meaning to.  This last point is still a point floating in my head though.  Maybe imaging God becomes a great deal easier rather than automatic, not sure….. 

There has been a great deal of freedom in this concept for me.  I have stopped trying to have a spiritual life, but have begun training, in small steps I might add to have one.  I don’t feel near as bad when it comes to hearing about what others have been able to do in this because I am aware of where I am at in the training process.

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Been a while

It has been quite a while since the last post.  There are a number of reasons for this which I will not get into, but I thought that I would go ahead and start writing some things down again. 

Firstly, since my last post I have changed jobs.  I have taken time away from the avenue of paid ministry and have moved into the realm of social services – or should I say Kingdom services, depending on how you look at it 🙂 

Anyways, I am working with an organisation called Passages Resource Centre.  This is a centre for homeless and transient young people between the ages of 12-25.  There are a range of things I do while working with the people who access the service.  These include, finding accomodation, finding a job, mentoring/counselling, and networking them in with a number of available services around the area.  I am hoping to be able to share some of the experiences I have with this as time goes on.

In regards to some future posts, I am going to debrief myself on here about some of the things that I have been moved by over the last week.  A man named Randy Harris has been here over the last week and I have had the privalege of sitting, wrestling, and learning from his experiences and wisdom.  At the moment, if I was to write about some of the musings it would be quite jumbled and scattered.  So what I want to do is take one thought at a time and unpack what I have been able to take from it.  So be on the look out!

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